Teeth

There has been a lot of talk about money. Mostly, how the hell are we going to get any now. And, on a more personal level, how quickly and unabashedly I spend it. Yesterday, as usual, we were talking about money. I sat there with my D&G watch on my wrist and listened to my friend tell me about how his younger brother didn't have two front teeth from 6th grade until college because his parents couldn't afford dental insurance. And even though I have always said that I will never feel guilty about my choices, I felt a little guilty. And even though I swore honestly to god that I will never apologize for the way I live my life, ever again, I felt a little apologetic. There were often times when I wished I was a little more this, a little less that, and there was a time when I said forget it, just be what you are. And then there is a time when I still wish I am a little more this, a little less that, despite what I told myself before.

I actually have pretty fucked up teeth myself, because when I was younger my parents told me that getting wisdom teeth pulled out is a hoax conspired by dentists to scam money from us. As a result, now I need all 4 wisdom teeth taken out like, 4 years ago, and on top of it all, braces to restore my naturally straight teeth. And I have no dental insurance. I can't say I'm not a teeny bit bitter. But even so, I'm pretty sure that were I to knock out my two front teeth, my parents can afford to replace them. Did I ever think of this as a luxury before today? Not really. But, what do I know. The world is full of people living completely different lives. How do we all fit together? I have no clue. Maybe we don't.